i rule.

back in december, i got pulled over for the first time in my life.
i think i meant to blog about it but i never did.
maybe another day.
long story short, my new york registration had been up some months prior, and i had yet to register my car in california.
the truth? my car wouldn't pass the california smog test. therefore it could not be registered.
so i was basically riding around until they got me.
and they got me.

luckily i was in the car with matt and chris so they helped me calm down. and the officers were crazy nice and just gave me a fix-it ticket. get your car registered and show us the proof by february.

awesome!
except...
car still wouldn't pass the smog test.
so when i came back from christmas in new york, i bought myself a new car.

this car was registered and i switched over my car insurance and blah blah blah - all good. i called the court to ask if i had to come in or if i could mail in a copy of the registration. they said i could just mail it in, except... the ticket was for my saab. not my new car. buying a new car does not totally fix the problem [legally, at least]. so they set a court date for me so that i could try my luck at getting out of paying the $256 fine.

that date was today.

this was my first time in a court of any kind.
i finally found the parking garage [on a dead end street behind the court building] and ran through the court yard with the rest of the masses. there was a long line at security. i finally got through and went to the 2nd floor. i waited in line for awhile where i thought that maybe all i had to do was talk to a person behind the counter. wrong. they told me i was supposed to be on the 4th floor.
"it started at 8:30"
8:39.
shit.

i ran upstairs and into my designated courtroom, whereupon i found myself one of about 75 fellow offenders. i signed in and took a seat in the very back. the court officer played us our rights and gave us a detailed description of what we were in for. he was. hilarious. whenever he talked i felt fine, it was only when he stopped that i started shivering and became nauseous with anxiety. 2 1/2 hours i sat in that room. 2 1/2 hours i listened as case after case was brought in front of the judge [failure to stop at a red light, driving without a license, no proof of insurance, driving in the wrong lane, etc etc etc]. 2 1/2 hours i went over in my head the most succinct way to explain my case without pissing off the judge ["this is not the place for you to tell your story - this is an arraignment. i read you your citation and ask you what you want to do and you say "not guilty," "guilty," or "no contest." if you plead not guilty, THEN you will have the opportunity to sit down and explain yourself at a later date"]. the last thing i wanted to do was come back to this place.

i sat through and listened to hours of the guilty and the guiltless, the infractions and the misdemeanors, the spanish and the korean, the young and the old, the women with babies and the woman with breast cancer. my leg shook uncontrollably [much like joe lydon's in french class] and i was freezing. i went to use the bathroom and saw a large sign with the dress-code: no tank tops, mini skirts, etc. my dress is freaking short today. i spent the rest of the morning trying to reveal the least amount of thigh.

finally i heard my name and i moved up front. closer, now.
the rows in front of me all moved up to the bench and i knew my time was near.
it was soon my time to sit before the judge. i moved up to the bench of doom, flanked by 3 older men.
"i can't believe we're the last ones," said the one to my left.
"yeah, but at least now no one else can hear what i did wrong."
i turn around and there are maybe 4 people left in the court room. that's what i get for showing up late. but hey, my stage fright is dissipating.

"ok, next we have jessica neilson"
"hi"
"your ticket is for driving without registration. do you have proof of registration- oh yes, it looks like you do"
:as i hand my new car's registration to the court officer: "my car wouldn't pass the smog test so i couldn't register it so i went out and bought a new car."
"ok, so that's not the registration for the old car. it's for the new car. so that's not reeeally fixing it. "
"...ohh...."
"do you have proof that you no longer have the old car?"
"no-"
"how am i supposed to know? "
"no..i'm in the process of donating it."
"so you still have your old car."
"yes, in my garage."
"ah, ok. well..at least it's good that you're not driving it if it won't pass the smog.."
:looks at me for a moment and gives what i believe to be a tiny smile:
"ok. just this once, i'm going to dismiss this. $25 dismissal fee. just make sure and get rid of the car." :another smile?

i left feeling elated, proud, and like a good person.
the whole time i was up there she was rambling on looking down at her papers, but i swore i sensed something change as soon as she took a moment to make eye contact with me. i felt like for the split second that she looked up and at me that she could tell that i was a good person and that i really did try. i bought a new car, for pete's sake. it was as if she knew i had never been in trouble, had never been pulled over, and would never be back in that court room again.
and who knows, i may be completely crazy. it's very possible i imagined those hints of smiles. and with only 3 more people to go after me, maybe she just wanted to get the hell out of there.